What the hell!!

Saturday night we were scanning through Bill's Tivo, and this is a picture of the screen. I was laughing so hard!! I had to take a picture.

Bowling & Live Entertainment

Saturday night we went to O'Fallon Bowl and bowled in a 9 pin no tap tournament. There was a large group at the lanes on our left. I saw one of the funniest things I have seen in a very long time. This older lady was up bowling, she stumbled and then her hat and wig fell on the lane. She picked up her hair and tossed it to the people in her group and put her hat back on. OMG! I laughed so hard. And to think you guys thought all the hoosiers lived out here by us! HA! They were actually a really annoying group, they did not care if you were up standing on the lane getting ready to bowl, they would just walk up anyway and bowl. They were driving us insane. I can't stand O'Fallon Bowl.

Newest Family Member

We have a new family member. He is a bearded dragon, 1 1/2 years old. His name is Forest. He is really awesome. In the next few days we will also have a baby bearded dragon. Here is a pic of a bearded dragon. It is not Forest, I don't have a camera to take a picture of him.

Lack Of Blogging

I was looking at my blog and noticed hmmmm, I haven't blogged in awhile. So the only thing I really have to blog about are movies. So here are my reviews on some movies I have seen lately.

Twilight:
Went and seen this today at the theater. WOW! It was so good, and really stayed true to the book. It is a must see and a must read.

Tropic Thunder:
This movie SUCKED ASS! It was so stupid and a waste of such good talent!!

Bucket List:
Another must see movie. Then again anything with Morgan Freeman is good!

Beer For My Horses:
Very funny! I expected this movie to be as bad if not worse than Tropic Thunder, but was really surprised at how good it was. Gotta love Rodney Carrington!

Vantage Point:
One of the best movies I have seen in a long time! It is a very intense movie. When the tension finally broke my eyes welded up with tears, I wasn't crying it was just that intense!!

The Happening:
Another good movie, Kayla loved it!

Get Smart:
It was pretty good, I think the reason I loved the movie so much is because I was such a big fan of the show as a kid.

Iron Man:
One word AWESOME!

Incredible Hulk:
Another great movie, If you seen The Hulk that came out a few years ago, like me you probably thought it sucked, but this new version with Edward Norton was really good.

The Punisher:
Really great movie, I have had this dvd for a long time but never watched it. Kenny & Bill love this movie, so I finally watched it with them the other night. It also has an allstar cast including John Travolta.

I think that is about all I have, it was a very boring post but hey at least I posted something!

Only 22 more days until Mamma Mia is out on dvd!! Can't wait!!

BOO!!

Yesterday morning I got one hell of a scare!!

I was taking my shower and was just getting ready to turn the water off when the lights went out. Which that alone is scary being that there is no light what so ever in our bathroom! So I opened the shower curtain and was getting ready to reach for the door knob to open the door for some light, when this thought popped into my head.....

If I feel someone standing there when I reach for the door I will shit myself!

Now my heart is pounding cause I just scared myself. I open the door (noone there of course), grab my towel and wrap it around me without drying off and very carefully walk to the living room.

Now my thinking is that both my bedroom doors are closed and the electric panel is in my closet....I need to go in there and make sure no one is in there. So I grab one of my metal mop handles and strike the fighting pose and head for my bedrooom. Again no one was there.

The 2 main reasons I was so scared was that:

-I was home alone
-We get some bad storms, and the power never goes out, why on just a barely rainy day does the power go out?

What a great way to start the day! Needless to say it did not take me long to get dressed and get the hell out of there!

Homecoming Pictures

Finally!!

Homecoming Pictures Maybe?

Coming soon! Blogger won't upload anything right now!

Homecoming

A couple of weeks ago I told some of you about theboy that Kayla liked, his name is Harley. Well I have a news update..................

Him & the other girl are no longer dating and he asked Kayla to Homecoming today, and of course she said yes. So not only is she going to her first homecoming but she also has a first date also.

I expected Bill to be a problem with this, but now Doug is being all Mr. Protective also! I feel so bad for her on Saturday! I will be fighting for her rights all day and evening!

She is also going to be in the homecoming parade tomorrow!!

OMG!

While reading some news today on MSNBC, I found this article. This is so funny & stupid at the same time. You can also click on the title for the link to the story.

Man charged with battery for farting near cop


SOUTH CHARLESTON, W.Va. - A man has been charged with battery on a police officer for allegedly passing gas and fanning it toward a patrolman.
Jose A. Cruz, 34, of Clarksburg, W. Va., was pulled over early Tuesday for driving without headlights, police said. According to the criminal complaint, Cruz smelled of alcohol, had slurred speech and failed three field sobriety tests before he was handcuffed and taken to a police station for a breathalyzer test.
As Patrolman T.E. Parsons prepared the machine, Cruz scooted his chair toward Parsons, lifted his leg and "passed gas loudly," the complaint said.
Cruz, according to complaint, then fanned the gas toward the officer.
"The gas was very odorous and created contact of an insulting or provoking nature with Patrolman Parsons," the complaint alleged.
He was also charged with driving under the influence, driving without headlights and two counts of obstruction.
'I couldn't hold it no more'Cruz acknowledged passing gas, but said he didn't move his chair toward the officer nor aim gas at the patrolman. He said he had an upset stomach at the time, but police denied his request to go to the bathroom when he first arrived at the station.
"I couldn't hold it no more," he said.
He also denied being drunk and uncooperative as the police complaint alleged. He added he was upset at being prepared for a breathalyzer test while having an asthma attack. The police statement said he later resisted being secured for a trip to a hospital that he requested for asthma treatment.
Cruz said the officers thought the gas incident was funny when it happened and laughed about it with him.
"This is ridiculous," he said. "I could be facing time."

Tech Support

Dear Tech support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed aDistinct slow down in overall system performance, particularly in the flowerAnd jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such asRomance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 and then installed undesirablePrograms such as NBA 5.0, NFL 3.0 and Golf 4.1.Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes theSystem. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.What can I do?
Signed,
Desperate.


DEAR DESPERATE,

First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband1.0 is an operating system.Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme.HTML and try to download Tears 6.2And don't forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that application worksAs designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applicationsJewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.But remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 toDefault to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1. Please note thatBeer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother- In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in theBackground that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)Also do not attempt to reinstall Boyfriend 5.0 program. These areUnsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memoryAnd cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buyingAdditional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Cooking 3.0 and Hot Lingerie 7.7.

Good Luck,
Tech Support

Artsy Fartsy

Last Sunday I started a 4 book series that I just couldn't read fast enough. Twilight is the first book, book 2 is called New Moon, book 3 is Eclipse and the 4th and final book is callled Breaking Dawn. The movie Twilight comes out in December.........CAN'T WAIT!! It is the story of a human girl whom falls in love with a male vampire. It is without a doubt a love story. I finished the last book just a little while ago. The 4 books have a total of 2,528 pages, which I read in just 7 days! Maybe that will give you an idea of how good the story is.



I also recently went to see the movie Mamma Mia, WOW, what a great movie. I have always been a big fan of movie musicals. My grandmother and I loved to watch them when I was growing up, Singing in the Rain & My Fair Lady are still some of my favorites, of yeah I almost forgot......Meet me in St. Louis & Hello Dolly!



Some of my other favorites that are not from that time period would be:



Grease

Rocky Horror Picture Show

Evita

Andrew Lloyd Webbers Phantom Of The Opera

Moulin Rouge (I like this movie but it is one that I can't watch over and over again, if I see it once every few years then I am ok with that)

Rent





There are so many that I would love to see live, but of course Bill does not have the same taste for these that I do. But Kayla is getting older and she enjoys these movies very much, she also loved Mamma Mia. So I am looking forward to being able to take her. I have only seen Phantom & Evita live so there is alot out there for us to see.



As far as the movies go, Mamma Mia is at the top of my list along with Grease, these are 2 movies that I could never get sick of watching! If going to a theater was not so pricey I would be going back to see Mamma Mia again & again.




I guess that's all I got to say about that.

DONE!!!

I am so done with my dogs!!! They (as in both of them) are about to find themselves staying outside and never coming in my house again! Jill just refuses to potty outside, last night she pooped on the floor on Bill's side of the bed and pee'd on my down comforter! I am ready to put a size 9 1/2 in her ass! In the last week or so Jack has decided that he will start pooping in the house. Everyday while we were gone on the float trip, he pooped in the house. So I excused it, I figured after the tail surgery and then us leaving he was stressed. But now the last 2 nights he has pooped in the house. Just a little while ago I got the belt out for Jack, I also informed him that he will be sleeping outside tonight. I have NO patience for this kind of crap.

And yes I am bitching again!

Thats How I Roll

Things have been a little crazy lately! When it fricken rains, it pours! My favorite new saying is......My name is Chris Johnson and that is how I roll.

So last week I went and got 2 new front tires for my car, and the same day the dog had an overpriced tail amputation. That same night the driver rear tire goes flat....figures, So I have been filling it up every morning. Yesterday I cleaned the inside of my car, hit the dome light button and it is on all day,My car has 3 of them! Guess what!?! Dead battery! So today when we are getting ready to go to Ella's birthday party, we jumpstart the car, fill the tire and head to IGA for beverages. Bill comes out and the tire is flat! Great! So we decide we need to change the tire, but of course we have no tire iron because the tire place forgot to repack it back into my car! Flippin Wonderful!!! After sitting in the parking lot for 20 minutes trying to figure what to do, and old neighbor happened to be in town and saw us, so he pulled over and saved the day. Tire is changed but we decide that we are just going back home, I have already put alot of miles on that doughnut, plus I still have to drive into O'Fallon tomorrow to get new tires, so we really don't need to be driving into O'Fallon for a birthday party that will be ending about 15-20 after we get there.

Like I said my name is Chris Johnson and thats how I roll!!



Last week when at target I decided to buy 2-6 packs of bic lighters, we will be needing them for the float trip. When I cleaned out my car, I found another 10 lighters under the seats and in different compartments. Anyone need a lighter??


Off to bed!!!

R.I.P. George Carlin

What a sad day! One of the funniest men ever will be missed!







Forever famous: "Seven Words You Can Never Say On TV" and many more.

Duh!!

Saturday evening the kids come up to the shop, they found a snake. Being that I love snakes I was the first out. I went out picked up the snake and we all looked at it. It was about 12 inches long. Bill arrives and says I think that is a copperhead. Yeah right is my thinking, so we get a jar and put it in there. Doug is coming out after all, we must save it for him. (He REALLY hates snakes!!) After upon further inspection I am beginning to wonder what kind it is, so off to see a few neighbors. They all say that it is a copperhead and chew my ass for picking it up, the babies are more poisonous than adults. Now after further research it was a copperhead. What the hell was I thinking just going out there and picking it up. Before the snake ws killed, we had all the kids take a good look at it and let them know that they are to stay away from a snake that looks like that one. It hurt to have to watch the snake be killed, but since it was a poisonous snake it had to be done. I also will have to stop picking up snakes, I don't want my kids to think that they can just pick up any snake.

Also since I know most of my friends HATE snakes, I have added a picture, just for that squirmy effect that you have right now!

Love you guys!

Marriage & Gas

Gas prices are up to $3.60 a gallon! When I was filling my gas hog the other day, I got to thinking about when Bill & I first got married. He was stationed in California, so after the wedding we packed up our Ford Festiva and headed out west. Since it was Febuary we had to take the southern route. Texas, New Mexico, Arizona, Nevada & Cali of course. When we were driving in the middle of no where, you would see signs for last chance for gas for 250 miles, no problem in our car. Hell we got 54 MPG city, and 68 MPG highway. But we would always fill up because really it was not the last gas for 250 miles, You could get it but would have to pay $3.50 a gallon for it. Of course are thinking was........There is no way we are paying that! Not when we are used to paying about $1.15 a gallon! Now here we are paying $3.60 a gallon, and they are talking about it hitting $4.00. Our car now only gets about 21 MPG! Instead of the $20.00 it used to take I am now paying about $54.00 to fill up, and because of all of the driving I do in a week, I am doing that 2-3 times a week! OY! Sure wish I had that Ford Festiva now!! Wasn't it great the days when you could go to the gas station with $5.00 and have about 1/4 tank of gas!! Sure is making me consider getting back into a 4 cylinder car!!

I am ssooooo looking forward to Idol this week, when they announced last week that this weeks mentor is going to be Andrew Lloyd Weber!!, I was ecstatic!! I can not wait until tomorrow night! I also am glad that it is a Dave & Em Idol night for me.

We bought the kids the game called Rock Band the other day. What a cool game. I am sorry for you people who only own a wii, you are missing out on a great game.

The kitties will be a week old, they are so cute! Midnight, Kayla's cat went into heat over the weekend, so I guess by the end of June we will have more kitties! Bill is just happy about that. NOT!

We have dial up now, until CenturyTel gets out here a fixes my DSL. Let me just say that dial up SUCKS!! Holy crap it is slow......Dial up should be made obsolete.

Well I am out of here, I am going to play Rock Band before I go to bed. Night All!

Babies!!

At 8:30 tonight we had our first baby born. It is now 9:45 and we have 3 so far. 2 are black & gray, the 3rd one is pure white. We are unsure of the white one right now, it is only a few minutes old, but not showing any signs of life right now. Hopefully it will pull through.

I will update more later. Bill has been taking pictures. Our poor Cheyenne is sooo tired.


11:29-She has had 5 so far, the 5th was about an hour ago. The 3rd one that was born didn't make it. The 4th one looks like Zeus, Bill has been calling it Zeus Jr. cause it is veeerrryyyy vocal! It has been very loud and crying alot. She feels like she has one or two more left in her yet. We are afraid to go to bed, we want to be with her in case she needs help. Bill has been calling them bar brats, cause they were born under the bar.




6:25 am.........No more babies, we have a black & gray one, a black & tan one, a orange one like zeus, and a gray one.